Archives For 2014 Winter Olympics

Words Are Not Enough

MH3 —  February 23, 2014

Words are not enough to describe the last few days.

Our Canadian women and men laying waste to the Olympic hockey world. Our collective heartbeat thumping as one. Our hopes for gold doubly fulfilled.

We gathered as families, friends, colleagues, and classmates. We celebrated with strangers, commuters, bar hoppers, and barber shoppers. We arranged fake meetings, organized staff parties, and begged for Olympic-inspired class lessons; in hopes we could watch.

Hockey gremlins placed televisions in the strangest of places, as if inspired by the cleverest of Bell ads. Hockey addicts unapologetically stole looks at your laptop screen and bought permission with a shrug that said they couldn’t breathe without knowing the score.

Go Canada Go.

It didn’t come easy and we are glad it didn’t. Handwringing galore over our men’s lack of scoring was rudely overthrown by sheer panic in the women’s final. But while a goal post physically kept the team alive, it was the heart those women shared that downed this American dream.

For our men the final was not so climactic, yet the manner in which they played was equally dramatic. Mega-stars all, yet every one playing like a fourth line grinder, back-checking the Swedes into a ground chuck fit to become an Ikea meatball.

In the end, we can all name the champions we adore. Wickenheiser the ageless wizard. Toews the golden goal getter. At opposite ends of their hockey careers, each a multiple-champion, each surrounded by the same.

There are no words to describe them all.

McRib Fries the Tomato!

MH3 —  February 15, 2014

I love the fact that Mark McMorris has become the most followed athlete of the 2014 Olympic Winter Games.

He has now triumphed over Shaun White, aka the former Red Tomato, on both the slopes and the internet. Yesterday he was declared the most followed athlete as his broken rib medal-winning performance, combined with his made-in-Saskatchewan good looks, have proven too much for the once untouchable White. You may recall that White withdrew from the snowboard slopestyle event, declaring the course unsafe. McMorris, already suffering from a broken rib, took on the course and safely triumphed.

So now what for McMorris? It would seem the sky is the limit. No pun intended.

He could easily follow his dad into politics and become a provincial MLA….

He could sign with McDonald’s and do McRib commercials until he reaches old age….

He could start dating one of the teenaged groupies who brought him Timbits to his Toronto media interviews this weekend…. (Were they groupies or Tim Hortons marketing staff?)

He could apply for a trademark ruling on whether he or the Grey Cup champs are truly the best “riders” from Saskatchewan….

He could accept the honorary jersey I’m sure the Roughriders will bestow upon him at their home opener….

He should make sure he gets royalties from that same jersey as the Riders would sell your grandma’s green socks if they can make a buck from it….

He could ride off into the sunset, steering his BMW X5 through the prairie glow….

He best get ready for a wild trip.