Safely seated on the sideline, far from the field where his thirteen-year-old was doing battle with a bigger opponent. The sideline where four volunteers were enthusiastically supporting his progeny, the critic went to work.

As his son’s team blew a lead and suffered their second, but only their second, defeat of the season, he let loose with his unabated commentary. “The team wasn’t well coached. It was their fault. They clearly knew nothing about the game. The offence was too complex for kids this age. Look at the other team. They just hand the ball to their biggest player and he runs left and right.”

On and on he proffered his thoughts to those around him, clearly unaware that the involuntary listeners had no interest in his comments, but they heard every word. For some, they dismissed your commentary. For others, it offended.

So, let’s dissect the situation a bit:

Your son plays on a youth football team.

This team is coached by four volunteers, all who also have sons on the team.

The team is in first place.

The team has NEVER been in first place.

The team lost its last two games of the season.

Both games were meaningless because the team had clinched first place.

The team has NEVER clinched first place.

You have never offered to help coach the team.

In fact, you have never asked the coaches any questions.

Such as: Why do you run the offence you run?

Why was it chosen from the three approaches you were considering in pre-season?

What did you see in the players that made you pick this approach?

How about these questions:

How much time do you put in every week coaching my son and his friend?

What time commitment does it take beyond what I see? How much of their own money have the coaches shelled out buying cleats for kids that don’t have them, lunch for players who hadn’t eaten on game day, fees for kids whose parents can’t afford to pay?

Perhaps you could ask them about your team manager who chases kids, parents, aunts, uncles, siblings, grandparents for confirmation of your son’s teammates attendance?

Or, how much time it takes us to clean and fill water bottles, make sandwiches for bus trips, find replacement mouth guards, and pack the first aid kits?

It might be good for you to chat with some of the many parents who voluntarily car pool kids whose families don’t have cars, bring their parents to road games, and buy ice cream for after-practice treats.

No, you were too busy being a critic.

Too mean spirited to maybe pause and think perhaps the coach is testing new things out for the playoffs today.

Too immature to understand that with the team’s top runner out with an injury, the focus of the game may be trying to ensure the rest of the team understands their potential.

Too focused on their complaints to see the mistakes being made by their own son, who instead of being berated when he started crying on the sideline, was comforted by coaches and teammates alike.

Too self-centered to realize that many of the people hearing his comments were on the verge of anger, but decided to swallow their rage.

Congratulations. You are a super star critic. In fact, you are so good, you should get a trophy for your efforts. It must take extra work to be a critic of a first-place team.